A chat with the “Old” Me

I always find myself telling clients and friends to look forward and not backward – I mean, the past is only to be learned from right? However, when you take the time to remember WHO YOU USED TO BE, you can have a better appreciation and understanding for who you are TODAY and see just how far you’ve come!

 

So, today, I’ll give you some insight into the “Old” me…and what thoughts ran through my head before I began my mission with fitness about 5 or more years ago…

 

” OH MY GOODNESS – I am so stressed out! I can’t pinpoint one particular thing it could it – It’s work, it’s money, It’s relationships – I have so much stress and have no idea how to handle it all! I feel like no one understands me and that I’m so far off in my head that I try to act like a happy person than I feel on the inside. I just cover it all up hoping it’ll go away… Sidenote, maybe if I have another Starbucks, Caramel upside down macchiato to be exact, or even a tall glass of wine…or 3….it’ll help me deal or at least stay awake through it all!

 

There’s really no point in even trying to work off the stress with a workout. After I drag myself up to get dressed and climb into the gym, I try workout for a week and then maybe a couple of more weeks after that and see NO results. Like, none! So, why even try? I even skip meals here and there and try to cut back calories – I eat all fat free, low carb…I read the magazines and try to follow diets but nothing seems to work. The fat burners I’ve bought work, but they are so expensive! That’s okay, I’ll be going out later anyway and when I’m drinking and having fun, none of this matters anyway right?

 

before

Don’t get me started on my ‘love life.’ If you can call it that. I try to date and open up to people but they just hurt me over and over again, I don’t get it! I’m the nicest girl, I cook for them, I make our weekend plans, but they just seem to either not respect me or think I want to get too serious too fast….grr..I hate dating, shouldn’t I be married by now?!

 

J

 

And don’t even get me started on people. They drive me nuts! That’s why I find it easier to gossip and just keep frenemies close by, I mean, why not right?? No one’s going to stick around for the long haul anyway. I’ve got Jaeden and that’s all I need right?

 

Honestly, I feel lost. I feel like no matter how many people I surround myself with that I feel empty. I’m always sad and always down, but try to be positive on the outside. I don’t understand why I’ve been dealt the cards I’ve been dealt  – it’s so unfair!”

 

I think to myself: WHO WAS I?? WHY WAS I SO NEGATIVE?

 

I mean, even in the last year or so I’ve seen a huge shift in my overall attitude on life and my choices as a personal and individual. Even writing this, those thoughts are completely 100% those I’ve thought in the past. Those that know me now know that I am very mindful of what I now eat and do to work off stress through exercise and healthy habits instead of leaning on unhealthy ones. They also know that I remain positive and focused on my dreams and future goals rather than what everyone else is doing because that’s totally wasted energy. I even found the man of my dreams AFTER I was single for almost a year and wasn’t actively looking to date. He is supportive, likes to enjoy life with me, and neither of us have to ‘try’ with the other to make anything work – with communication and genuine trust and care, it just does.

 

In 2010 I also gave my heart to God and began to trust in His love instead of my own understanding. It wasn’t working, what I thought was the right thing to do, and I knew he would lead me to better and happier days.

 

 

letgo

 

 

He led me to finding what my true passion was, what kind of environment to surround myself with, and how to calm down instead of getting riled up easily over the little things.

 

 

My purpose in writing this post today was to show people WHO I was before. People see who I am now and know I had a weight loss journey but don’t necessarily see how lost and low I was before inside my own thoughts. I am by no means 100% Miss positive ALL of the time nor am I complete on my journey through life. We’re all works in progress throughout our lifetimes.

 

IMG_5915

 

To those I coach and work with, I try to be that guide that I once needed needed. That positive and supportive force that could teach positive thoughts. Positive lessons like how hard work is the only way to get through tough spots – nothing is handed out freely. It all starts with a belief in what is possible and then work to get to that goal – SURROUNDING ONE’S SELF WITH POSITIVITY and not mindless noise or things or habits is how to get anything we want in life!

 

 

Have you looked back at WHO you were BEFORE to appreciate WHO you are NOW?

 

HI! I'M KAT - I am a pug-mom, wife, NASM Certified Personal Trainer, & Fitness Coach focusing on living the fit life while tackling work, coaching others - doing it all! My blog is to hold me accountable for all the goals I plan on accomplishing and also a way for me to try to inspire others through my own experiences - if I can do it ANYONE can! Fitness is a huge part of my life as well as travel and seeing all that life has to be lived! PAY IT FORWARD!

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35 Comments
  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 7:30 am

    Thanks for sharing your story this way. While I don’t have quite that kind of story, I do know that my running has come a long way and had quite an impact on me. Always am interesting journey!
    Jodi Stuber recently posted…It doesn’t get easier…My Profile

    • Reply
      October 22, 2014, 8:56 pm

      Thanks so much Jodi! Everyone’s story can be so different, but it’s amazing how when we share it we can help so many people see that things are possible!

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 7:56 am

    Awww this is wonderful, and I think it is good to reflect back on where we came from sometimes. You are the poster child for becoming healthy, and you really can see it in your smile 🙂 Thanks for sharing!
    Tina muir recently posted…Find Your Strong- Is the “Runner” Body Image Finally Changing for the Better?My Profile

    • Reply
      October 22, 2014, 8:57 pm

      Thanks Tina! It’s such a positive way to see how far you’ve come for sure!

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 8:15 am

    OH MY GOODNESS YES.
    I know this is why even as I age I NEVER EVER WANNA GO BACK IN TIME.
    CARLA recently posted…I wore my #wycwyc tee out.My Profile

    • Reply
      October 22, 2014, 8:57 pm

      No ma’am, we grow so much!

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 8:27 am

    Wow, just love this! I can definitely see how I have changed over the years. Wouldn’t trade the experiences because they made me who I am now. Great post, Katrina!
    Jen recently posted…Secret ingredient loaded scrambled eggs {PALEO}My Profile

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 8:35 am

    Life is such a crazy ride! So glad that I’ve gotten to ride shot gun with you for so many years! So proud of you & grateful for our friendship! XOXO

    • Reply
      October 22, 2014, 8:58 pm

      Love you girlie so blessed to have you in my life still!

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 9:09 am

    What an amazing post Kat! Thanks for being so honest. I’m sure it was hard to share those thoughts you had in the past. You are such an amazing person and such an inspiration to all those around you!
    Mindy @ Road Runner Girl recently posted…Gulf Coast Half Marathon Recap!My Profile

    • Reply
      October 22, 2014, 8:58 pm

      Thanks so much Mindy – your story is so amazing too!

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 9:09 am

    Thanks for sharing your story, Kat. Its always amazing to look back and see how much progress we’ve all made. We’re often focused on how much further we have to go, but if we look at how much we’ve already accomplished, it makes it easier to celebrate the progress.
    Kathryn @ Dancing to Running recently posted…2014 Army Ten Miler ReviewMy Profile

    • Reply
      October 22, 2014, 8:58 pm

      thanks for taking the time to read it Kathryn!

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 9:24 am

    Great post – it’s important to look back and appreciate how we’ve come and understand how we got there – as long as we don’t dwell in the past or let it rule us!
    Ruthie@She’sWickedHealthy recently posted…Ready for a little fun? Let’s Play “The Last Time I…” Game!My Profile

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 9:53 am

    Everyone has such a personal story and I love hearing it. Thanks for sharing!
    Mellissa recently posted…Wine Wednesday Mount Hermon RedMy Profile

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 9:58 am

    What an inspiring story. Your journey to finding true happiness is inspiring. Thanks for opening up and posting about it. Progress can be such a good thing.
    I laughed out loud at your dating comment… OH, have I been THERE!
    Julie @ Running in a Skirt recently posted…Black Balsam HikeMy Profile

    • Reply
      October 22, 2014, 8:59 pm

      Aw thanks Julie – Progress builds our character!

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 11:08 am

    I kinda new your story from post you have written in the past, but this was a full disclosure and a great one. Others can learn so much from how far you have come. It is possible and you have certainly shown how it can be done. Congrats on your incredible story.
    Pam recently posted…It’s Marine Corps Marathon week – getting readyMy Profile

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 12:50 pm

    You have come so far and accomplished so much. You are seriously inspiring. <3

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 1:13 pm

    Wow, you look amazing! I definitely notice a difference in my overall attitude based on the way I look and feel. Being positive takes a lot of effort and you can have or do or be anything if you just keep going and never give up. Well done!!

    http://www.Fashionabella.com

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 7:12 pm

    I love your story. it’s so similar to what happened in my life. Thanks for sharing your triumphant story.
    Haley @ Running with Diapers recently posted…A Day in the Life: Balancing a Newborn with a ToddlerMy Profile

  • Reply
    October 22, 2014, 10:07 pm

    Love ya girl! I’ve always been a firm believer of having dreams, making plans and reaching those goals. I love seeing when other people realize their dreams and reach their goals! You are a rock star in my book. 🙂
    xiomeeks recently posted…#CinderellaTour at the Straz CenterMy Profile

  • Reply
    October 23, 2014, 9:31 am

    Thanks for sharing this! I certainly have looked back and been grateful for who I am now and where I am now as opposed to the past. While you can’t change the past- it’s nice to see the progress and FEEL like such a different person than I was.
    Laura @losingrace recently posted…Empire State Half Marathon 2014 RecapMy Profile

  • Reply
    October 23, 2014, 9:42 am

    What a great thought. I honestly don’t really reflect and look back on things like I should. As I was reading, I kept thinking how that related to me and was similar to what I did a few years ago. I may just have to do a post like this. What a great idea.
    Heather @Fit n Cookies recently posted…Pumpkin Dip: Easy addition to your next partyMy Profile

  • Reply
    October 23, 2014, 1:05 pm

    The girl you described was me at one time too. Especially the “I’ll be having a drink later and won’t care” – sad but I lived in that state for years. I’m happy that I’m no longer that person and I’m happy for you. Thanks for sharing your story. People need to see how the Lord can help change a life, and how positive a healthy lifestyle can truly be! Keep it up girl!

  • Reply
    October 23, 2014, 4:41 pm

    I LOVE THIS!! And can totally relate! The old me dealt with stress in a lot of the same way. We have come a LONG way girl!
    Krysten recently posted…Surgery, Running, and ComplicationsMy Profile

    • Reply
      October 28, 2014, 8:32 am

      We both have girlie! xo

  • Reply
    October 23, 2014, 11:58 pm

    I AM ALWAYS looking at past GiGi and giving present GiGi a huge hug! I have come a long long way! 😉 Definitely not very good times way back when, but now, VOILA! ha ha!

    PS: SO nottttt lesbian but… Your boobs are hot!LOL!
    GiGi Eats recently posted…Recipe Redux: Lets Go Skinny Dipping!My Profile

    • Reply
      October 28, 2014, 8:33 am

      HHAHAHA I would’ve given them to you girl!

  • Reply
    November 3, 2014, 8:24 pm

    […] on your old self: and your new self […]

  • Reply
    November 4, 2014, 4:39 pm

    This is a great reflection! Lately I’ve been wondering why I can be so hard on myself sometimes when I’ll probably look back and wonder how I wasn’t happy. You are so hard-working and doing what you love now and it shows!
    Lauren recently posted…FloYo at Beachfit BaltimoreMy Profile

    • Reply
      November 7, 2014, 1:08 pm

      Yes, we deserve to give ourselves that!

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